A Soothing Rain poem

Another rainy day in Mumbai and another poem. This one is more soothing and relaxing than the earlier one which was about a more violent rain.

Drippy drizzly drowsy day,

Nibbling crispies at home, I stay.

Nursing a warm cup of tea and

Oh! What a rainy rainy day!

Washed window panes and roads

Soothing aromas of fresh leaves,

Cardomom and bay leaves,

Sneak up and caress my nose.

Curled up on a comfy sofa,

Nuzzling a cozy cushion

Reading a thrilling novel yet

Relaxing in a dreamy vision...

The real definition of Mumbai words

In Mumbai, here are the real definitions of public systems and
MUMBAI-

A crazy city with chain snatchers, train bombers, pick pockets , strong-willed politicians, party-mad celebrities but still Amchi Mumbai

CHAWL -

A housing arrangement for the poorer sections of society with dish antennas and Godrej bureaus sticking out of the metal roofs

ROAD - a barely-existent semi-flat part of the earth's surface where vehicles are supposed to travel.

GUTTER - The city's definition of living by the water-side or having a pool view.

BALCONY-
1. A useless place to store old cycles, broken furniture, clothes that don't fit etc.
2. Extra space provided by the builder to add to the space in the house.

AUTO -
A 3-wheeled vehicle that runs by itself and that runs in a zig-zag manner like a drunk snake

REAL ESTATE -
Space in the air where apartments used to stand but have collapsed

TREES -
As per birds, air conditioners are modern versions of trees
As per human beings, trees are green shady-providing things located only in weekend spots.

TAXIS-
A means of public transport where the driver refuses to drive you anywhere you want to go.

TRAINS -
Quick way to be flexible, agile and slim without going to a gym

BUSES -
A lesson in management concepts of: the art of hanging on by the fingertips, getting in and out Just-in-time etc.

CAR -
A very slow means of transport that guzzles expensive fuel and stalls in 2-feet of rain water every year, but still a must have

WINTER -
A time of year when we can actually wear our sweaters to air-conditioned malls and movie theaters

MOVIE THEATER -
The only getaway for working population that also cost the same as staying in a hotel in Lonavala overnight.

MALL -
A place for college kids and friends to hang out and a noisy place with the decibel levels of a rocket launch

and the final one.........
SKYWALK -
A shaky place that is close to heaven and hell and might get you there pretty quickly.
Students with low marks, wives weary of ill-treatment, husbands out of luck and money, the heartbroken are all headed here nowadays.

Rains = Onion Pakora and Masala Chai

Rainy seasons demands onion pakora and masala chai.

Here's the recipe of onion pakora the way I like it -crispy and spicy and simply too good when dipped in a good book.

Ingredients

2 onions cut in rings or into thin strips
2 spoons Besan or maida
1 spoon rice flour
1 spoon cornflour
Very small quantity of water
Add Chilli powder or chopped green Chilli for more spice
And salt for taste
Oil for frying

Put all the above ingredients in a bowl with just enough water so that they are mixed together. The taste of onion stands out this way and it doesn't become Bhajjia style (dripping with besan)

Deep fry till golden brown and enjoy.
For an added surprise element, you can put in some cashews. MMmmm can't wait for more rains

Mumbai Skywalker

Ever thought of flying over traffic jams in a helicopter? Well, while that is still not easily possible for us common people of Mumbai, the skywalks coming up – give some hope. Imagine coolly swishing over honking horns, rain logged roads, troubled pedestrians, violence prone dogs and frustrated brows! It will not only make a healthier populace but a less frustrated one. Like the evergreen character in Star Wars we can become Skywalkers - Mumbai Skywalkers ( remember Luke Skywalker?)

Us skywalkers will be happy, assuming of course that:

- There are more places to get on and get off these skywalks. I was unable to spot any staircases
- No hawkers are allowed on these skywalks – otherwise it would be like walking through a crowded market place outside any railway station
- No beggars, advertisers, thieves, marathon runners, policemen and pavement dwellers are allowed to get on it.

Sigh…what a beautiful dream it was, before I thought of all this.

Mumbai Sloshed

The city - Mumbai is drunk. There is water coming out of her ears. She is tired carrying the burden of millions of ungrateful humanity. But she is still beautiful - like a water colour painting.

Her bright lights look like god playing holi with the city. Mumbai in the rain is a lot like a prancing heorine in a coloured sari, singing and dancing, all the while being heedless of after effects...

Mumbai Weekend spot

If, like me, you are searching for a new and different place to spend your evenings or weekends - here is a unique place. It is the Aquarium and Boating at Vileparle West near Irla.

The boating is not the greatest of attractions, especially with the pre-monsoon showers turning into a full scale monsoon.

Neither is the aquarium so great as it is full of fish on the verge of strangulation. No idea when the tanks were last cleaned out...
Watch out for...
The cute little tortoise who is desperately trying to get out of the aquarium. That little fella has a couple of relatives outside in the aviary.

The aviary is the most exciting thing about this Aquarium and Boating place. There are some emus wandering around quite calmly (Not to be confused with ostriches). There are cockatoos, possibly some snow petrels, multi-hued parrots etc. Not a large collection but definitely a very interesting and colorful one.

A great place to take kids or an interesting outing for adults. I have been looking through Google and Wikipedia to understand the birds I saw there – because sadly they haven’t put up any information at all – not even the bird’s names!

P.S. Other exhibits include the common garden variety couples with no other place to go on a rainy day.

Logo change game

Its logo change season! Remember the time that serials like Jassi Jaisi… experimented with makeovers to increase their TRP? Companies in India too are going beserk changing their logo.

Godrej has put up its new and colorful logo (same font but 3 pleasing colours) all over. There are huge hoardings with no information except for the new logo. Thank you for adding colour to this dull city.


A second large and well-known organisation to change its logo is CEAT. It has lost all background and has suddenly emerged in the sunshine with just the words. Someone managed to eat up part of the ‘E’ though, the company obviously failed to notice it.

But what affects Mumbai most is its landmark and popular chain of stores - Shoppers Stop. What’s with them really? Their old logo looked pretty good, as it was. The new logo lacks character and looks like any of the thousands of brands that must be paying millions of rupees to stylish agencies. The colours are still the same - black and white. Imagine paying so much money to remove all character and uniqueness from your logo! Wonder why they did it - thus changing the face of this city as we know it for ever.

Splitter Splatter poem

Rains have started and ofcourse they call for a bit of poetry - rather than verse...

Splitter Splatter rain
Pounding on my roof
Whipping at the leaves
And banging on the cars

Battering down
From heavens above
Dashing to the ground
In islands of water.

Destroying, destructive,
Dancing sounds of fury
Oh! now its diminishing
Natures anger restrained.

Why Mumbais psychologists are confounded

Psychologists are now at their wits end as their profession has now become mostly guess work. What perpelexes them is the fact that people can no longer be diagnosed as mad or brain-impaired.

Wondering what I am bloggering about?

Well imagine any of the following scenarios and guess if the person is crazy or mentally-impaired...

1. Mental case: Person is seen often talking , arguing and laughing with himself (or herself) vociferously and in public places, even when there is not a soul nearby.

2. Psycho: Person talks in strange tongue and uses words like Blamestorming and boss-spasming

3. Amnesiac: Person calls same thing by different names each day - vada pav one day, bhim vada pav one day and goli vada pav another day. S/he calls everything from station to airport to housing society to road as Chhatrapati Shivaji.

4. Whacko: Person indulges in strange behaviors like tilting his head to the right while driving or walks with his head tilted to the left, groans in the simple act of sitting down and even cries when lifting a cup of coffee.

5. Utter fool: Person still crosses roads by running madly at dangerous intersections instead of using the subway provided

6. Illogical: Person types SMS in his mobile by holding it uncomfortably in front of his face


Indeed such strange behaviors instead of being indicator of mental health are indicators of a person up-to-date and modern in his life style. Here is the simple explanation for each...

1. Mental Case? Nah!! This is the simplest; He or she is talking on a mobile headset

2. Psycho? This is the latest jargon and with the invasion of laptops and computers in homes and offices, this is bound to happen.

3.Amnesiac: Politics and business in Mumbai is thus

4. Whacko Jacko? Poor man/woman has obviously been following rigorous exercise routine in gym or maybe even indulging in a bout of Krump or frump or other fad dance forms

5. Utter fool? No way! Subways are occupied by aggressive vendors. Who dares to enter their domain?

6. Not illogical but devious..this is the best way to take photos of an unsuspecting person!

No wonder psychologists no longer have an easy job!