Why Mumbais psychologists are confounded

Psychologists are now at their wits end as their profession has now become mostly guess work. What perpelexes them is the fact that people can no longer be diagnosed as mad or brain-impaired.

Wondering what I am bloggering about?

Well imagine any of the following scenarios and guess if the person is crazy or mentally-impaired...

1. Mental case: Person is seen often talking , arguing and laughing with himself (or herself) vociferously and in public places, even when there is not a soul nearby.

2. Psycho: Person talks in strange tongue and uses words like Blamestorming and boss-spasming

3. Amnesiac: Person calls same thing by different names each day - vada pav one day, bhim vada pav one day and goli vada pav another day. S/he calls everything from station to airport to housing society to road as Chhatrapati Shivaji.

4. Whacko: Person indulges in strange behaviors like tilting his head to the right while driving or walks with his head tilted to the left, groans in the simple act of sitting down and even cries when lifting a cup of coffee.

5. Utter fool: Person still crosses roads by running madly at dangerous intersections instead of using the subway provided

6. Illogical: Person types SMS in his mobile by holding it uncomfortably in front of his face


Indeed such strange behaviors instead of being indicator of mental health are indicators of a person up-to-date and modern in his life style. Here is the simple explanation for each...

1. Mental Case? Nah!! This is the simplest; He or she is talking on a mobile headset

2. Psycho? This is the latest jargon and with the invasion of laptops and computers in homes and offices, this is bound to happen.

3.Amnesiac: Politics and business in Mumbai is thus

4. Whacko Jacko? Poor man/woman has obviously been following rigorous exercise routine in gym or maybe even indulging in a bout of Krump or frump or other fad dance forms

5. Utter fool? No way! Subways are occupied by aggressive vendors. Who dares to enter their domain?

6. Not illogical but devious..this is the best way to take photos of an unsuspecting person!

No wonder psychologists no longer have an easy job!

Battlestations ! Autos are here

The autos-wallahs in Mumbai are an amazing lot. Especially the ones you find in the airports or cinema theatres. You ask them to go to the nearby station, or Bandra or Andheri .... and they refuse.

The autos outside the airports have the excuse that they have been standing in queue for many hours and therefore they are entitled to get as much money out of the trips as they can.

But how about the autos outside cinema theatres and office complexes?

As it is, Mumbai has limits as to where autos can go. They can't go much beyond Mahim on one side. So think about it - do they expect passengers to Navi Mumbai all the time? How many people who want to go to Navi Mumbai and in their senses can you find outside a cinema hall in Bandra or Andheri( at the cost of some 200-300 Rs)?

The autos are really aliens in disguise sent to spy on us. Whatever else they do ...they refuse to take passengers anywhere ( which is what they are expected to do). They want only passengers who want to go to the moon. So that they can earn the maximum of course!

My theory is supported by the interiors of autos ( space ships) decorated with eyes or lips, mysterious references to GODS and their power, about the eyesight of the blind and best of all Anarkali...